also re: poly and poly being inherently subversive/radikewl — people often talk about how monogamy has enabled/structured/codified a lot of violence through capitalism, misogyny, and racism to talk about DESTROYING MONOGZ!!11 but isn’t it also obvious how people — especially white men — have consumed, raped, owned, and colonized women (esp women of color) by desiring them all, being entitled to them all, owning them all… and still continue to do so? like, let’s be real. i’m not judging yr desires (necessarily — though desire isn’t exactly something neutral or pure either). i’m judging how you are perpetrating harm. and the problem isn’t necessarily monogamy.
violence can be perpetrated in any and all kinds of relationships, unless how you do relationships themselves is grounded in being super fucking deliberate about ending violence/oppression and handling yr shit
Breathless from all this truth right now.
ive been trying to say this for so long. thank you.
I see this sort of thing from other poly folks occasionally, and it makes me want to yell. A lot. I get tired of poly-superior type attitudes REAL quick.